Pride, Sobriety and the Power of Friends.
Pride, Sobriety and the Power of Friends.
I have a confession to make. I take selfies… a lot of them. #selfieaddict
It is wild how much flack I get for doing it… be it a fun and casual flacking or heavily weighted in judgment and opinion. There is this presumption that, just because I selfie like there is no tomorrow, I am narcissistic, insecure, and on the hunt for “like”-based increases in self esteem. Are these presumptions really the only possibility around why people take selfies?? #really?
Feeling attractive is new to me. I grew up feeling ugly, awkward, and unlikable; I certainly wasn’t beautiful or cool, whatever “cool” was at that time. Today, after a lot of self-care, fitness, and weightlifting I have come to find some confidence, and I fucking love it. I like that I can now look at myself in the mirror, or in the front-facing camera of my iphone, and like what I see. I do not poison myself, hate myself or call myself ugly anymore, nor do I wish that I were something or someone I am not. Today, I am who I am, I look how I look. I own it. I have come to love myself, and not in an overbearing I-cant-love-anyone-else kind of way… No. I love myself in a way that helps me move through my day with a jovial grace; a way that elicits comfort in conversation; a way that encourages me to continue caring for my body and treating it with kindness. #selfcare
Am I insecure because I take selfies? Or are you insecure because you can’t, don’t or won’t? #perspective
Do “likes” and Followers excite me? Yes, they do. I love that little orange notification bubble. It proves contact, an interaction with a fellow human being who is going about her or his day within the social media interspace. It tells me that this someone, somewhere else, has connected to me, if even just momentarily through a string of kilobytes, and finds something about me likeable. Is my self-esteem contingent on these “likes” and Followers?? No, but they certainly help. #like
Self expression has been part of human culture for millennia. Whether we tattoo our flesh, insert shards of bone into our ears, or weave a feather into our hair, we are taking advantage of the gift of expression. I feel privileged that I have the freedom to do so. Today’s selfie is simply another platform of expression and an unexpecting tool of self-discovery. #individuality
For me, as someone who used to hate himself, being able to post a picture of me, taken by me, and just how I like it, is an incredible feat. It is telling of my growth as an individual and it is telling of my growing confidence. It certainly isn’t symbolic of some insecure feature of my personality that needs your judgment and pity. #thatsforsure
In a recent Body Image Study, it was revealed that 65 percent of selfie takers said seeing their selfies on social media actually boosts their confidence (Dahl, Today Health, 2014). In my opinion, this is great! We need more confidence in this world, today more than ever. I like the thought that people’s confidence is being boosted by the creativity of her or his own hand. Power to you. #selfieconfidence
Instead of judging people who take selfies perhaps it is time to take a look at the reasons why you aren’t taking them. With all do respect, I think that it is time to #loveyourselfie
It is almost #selfietime, so… unapologetically, I leave you with my thoughts.
See you seeing me seeing you soon…
Chad Walters… #selfieaddict
Lip Dub vid to Alex Clare’s “Too Close”. Made with a Fujifilm Finepix camera and a chest tripod.
Inspired by a difficult decision to leave a relationship and all the inner turmoil and indecision that it brings. Trying to empower courage to walk forward from this challenge. It is made in high contrast as a representation of the challenge regarding fighting with the “should I or shouldnt I” emotions. Tough stuff, let me tell you.
…An excerpt from my Travelogue Enjoy The Journey
Last night there was a very large storm, a monsoon I believe them to be called over here. The lightening lit up the whole sky in a way that I have never seen before. I was fascinated, and frightened. I was away from Him at this point and spending time with the friend from Vancouver. She and I thought that it would be a brilliant idea to go down to the seashore and really feel the storm. Her inner unease had talked her out of the plan, and, as it started to rain, she made her way back to her guesthouse right next to mine. I went to drop off my camera and important goods, and then off into the weather went.
This storm did not take time to get fierce. Almost instantly the rain was surging from the black skies. Never before have I seen or felt rain so strong, nor so warm, it was harder and thicker than any bathroom shower. I ran and I ran and I ran. I was soaked in seconds. My heart was pounding and I could not ignore the rush of intensity pulsing through my body. The thunder clapped to an earth shaking degree. Light filled the sky for seconds, strike after strike the surroundings came into view. As I arrived to the shore I began to realize how scared I actually was. I saw Thai women hiding against cement beams that were holding up huts. I copied their procedure and ran to the nearest shelter. I found myself hiding behind this cement structure, crouching and hugging it for warmth as it was still radiating from the day’s sun. Wind was whipping past me, causing rain to ride the wind, making its way into my shelter. The street lights were light sensitive so with every lightning strike, they would blink off. I was inside a monstrous, wet strobe; the world was flashing before me. I could see bolts of lightening striking the sea, or what I hoped was the sea. I looked up into the sky and into a mass of clouds, and at that moment the lightning flashed. I could see the shape of a face in the clouds, seemingly looking at me.
I have had dreams in the past, of lightning, and of its immense power, and I felt blessed and touched by that power that night. I know that this sounds far-fetched and ‘Hollywood’ and that a face in the clouds seems hallucinogenic, but if you were where I stood, seeing what I saw at that moment, feeling what I felt at that moment, you would understand the power of that face. I knew, at that moment, that I do have the power within me to survive this. The power surrounds me. I felt totally liberated.
I am on my own today. That storm last night filled me with so much strength and empowerment that I was able to say goodbye and stay behind as He and the friend went to another island, in another place away from where I would be. I am on my own; I am not alone. I had been anxious about that moment of separation for a while now, but when the moment arrived, after the previous night’s power, it was as simple as wishing it. They packed their bags and we shared a breakfast. I hugged His friend, who has now became mine, not knowing if I am to ever see her again. I hugged Him, knowing that it was going to be the last. I watched them walk away.
I did it. My journey begins
photo from: http://www.wsi.com/industries-lightning.htm